Toni On New York!

Something is going on here and I suspect the mamas (and Ray) are involved. I am shrinking and shrinking and shrinking…so much so that my clothes are literally hanging off of me. This is not a complaint,sort of it is, but really it’s not. The funny thing is today I am wearing my old Levis, the ones that used to be my fat jeans back in the day. And, wait for it, they are now big on me!

I’ve spent the last week fighting off the crudiest crud of a cold that ever was. I have what my ENT dubbed “a nice, aggressive sinus infection” as she peered down my nose with a scope. Fun times… That, coupled with my INSANE week at work, and I have been completely out of commission on the workout front. It’s been all I can do to keep myself standing some days, never mind getting two kids, one husband and myself ready and out the door in the mornings.

It’s been mentally challenging to keep myself from spiralling into the pity, failure zone. Thoughts like “you suck, you’re gonna fail and make the mamas look bad” and “your flabtastic 40s are ready to welcome you with open, jiggly arms…don’t fight it, have a twinkie” keep popping into my head. But I have valiently, not perfectly and by no means not without some missteps, fought my way back to maintaining some level of consistency with everything else we’ve been learning about food and mental attitude.

As the weeks quickly fly by I have no idea if I’ll hit that magic number that was in my mind when we started. But, at this point, it really doesn’t matter that much to me. I’ve already achieved a level of success and accomplishment that a target weight will never be able to give me. The new habits and routines that I’ve begun to form will be in my daily life from here on out. It is my mission to find balance
in my crazed, over achieving, stress-addicted and chaotic life…and I will.

Now, I’m off to dig up my old jeans so I can figure out just how much more I need to do to squeeze my hot working woman/suburban mom ass into them!

Now, back to the blog!

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